Smile a new day. Jokes for a good mood on the 23rd of October 2018

Jokes for a good mood on 23 October 2018.

Посміхніться новому дню. Анекдоти для доброго настрою на 23 жовтня 2018 року

Positive emotions are important to humans, it is therefore necessary to regularly replenish the good mood of cheerful anecdotes, informs Rus.Media.

***

Excuse me, could you tell me the time?
– Forgive, but I will not tell!

***

– Hello, what’s the problem?
– I think, doctor, that when I speak, no one hears me. Help me please.
– Hello, what’s the problem?

***

A drunk husband returns home, his wife swears, why once drank so much.
Yeah a bit, took only a bottle for three.
– Why are you so drunk?
– Two are come…

***

Two grandmas in the morning at the entrance on a bench:
– What is today Petrovich, member, our, did not work out?
– So it yesterday a dog in the ass scraping, at home, probably sitting!
– And the truth is that he is now at work to do, to think that there is nothing!

***

The school handed out report cards with grades for the year. Vovochka returns home and, looking his father in the eyes, and said
– The main thing is that we are all healthy, right, dad?

***

– Your dog bit me! Now I intend to claim compensation!
Of course of course. Now I hold her, and you bite into health!

***

Hi.
Hi.
– What are you doing?
– Press swing!
– What is it?
– Useful for figure and health!
– Give a link, I also downloaded…

***

Hare had accidentally thrown a stone into the bushes where the wolf was sleeping and threw a stone at the wolf’s mouth.

READ  Scientists: "Loyalty" to one's physician is the key to health and longevity

Ran the hare, took him to the army or the Navy.

Served, returned home, the forest is singing:
– On leave goes a young sailor!
And then the wolf behind the Bush:
– Waiting in vain old son home!

***

The man comes into the yard and asked the owner of the house:
– And you have a dog there?
Is, she is very smart, I taught her to quietly sneak up and bite!
– Where is she, why not see it?
– That’s why not seen!

***

Looking a female penguin on a flying seagulls in the sky and thinks:
– Okay, tomorrow you go on a diet!

***

My son is 7 years old, tells me today: “do you know why dogs lick us? Because within us the bones”.

***

– Doctor, my apartment is on the ground floor and the truck drivers look me in the bedroom, what to do?
– Change the flat, but not too high that the pilots did not look!

***

On site dog walking:
– Your dog now will strangle my!
– Wait, I have a Bichon, and You have a Rottweiler…
Yeah, it had stuck in his throat!

***

It is known that a dog will never bite a good man.

Less well known is that most dogs are not very good at reading people.

***

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